Captain Jean-Luc Picard is French, he has french-sounding name and claims to be born in Labarre, France. So why does he drink Earl Grey, read Shakespeare in his quarter, and speaks in perfect thespian English. Why doesn’t he drink un verre du Beaujolais or Côtes-du-rhône off hours in Ten Forward while having Foie Gras, reading Emile Zola or Victor Hugo at his ready room while getting hammered with Calvados, and running the bridge in his cool French accent, “Open ze hailing frequency, Monsieur Data,” or “Putain! Fire les torpedoes on ze Klingon vessel!” Riker would have to get used being called “Numéro un.”

There is only one explanation for why Picard is fully anglicized: France totally lost to Britain in World War III, their culture is dead, and fully adopt the culture of the winner. Goodbye confit de canard, hello rosbif. Fuck off Molière, fuck me William Shakespeare.

While I don’t have anything against Picard as portrayed by Patrick Stewart, I think it might be a good idea to reimagine Star Trek: TNG with Gérard Depardieu as Captain “Julien” Picard, just as Roddenberry intended. Yo J.J, any thought on rebooting Star Trek: TNG with Depardieu as Picard?

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